How I Stopped Feeling “Behind” in My Tech Journey

For a long time, I felt behind.

Not because I wasn’t working hard.
Not because I wasn’t learning.

But because it always felt like everyone else was ahead.

Someone was solving harder DSA problems.
Someone was building better projects.
Someone was switching jobs faster.
Someone always seemed to be “doing more”.

This post is about how I stopped feeling behind in my tech journey — not by catching up with everyone, but by changing how I looked at progress.

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Where the Feeling of “Behind” Came From

Early in my journey, I spent a lot of time comparing:

• My skills vs others’ skills
• My GitHub vs others’ GitHub
• My pace vs others’ pace

Social media didn’t help.

People only share:

• Wins
• Promotions
• Offers
• Perfect projects

They don’t share:

• Confusion
• Self-doubt
• Bugs that took days
• Things they still don’t understand

I was comparing my everyday reality with everyone else’s highlight reel.

That comparison slowly killed confidence.

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The Truth I Didn’t Want to Accept

Here’s the uncomfortable truth:

Feeling behind doesn’t mean you’re actually behind.

It usually means:

• You’re learning something difficult
• You’re growing faster than before
• Your standards are increasing

Beginners rarely feel behind — they don’t know what they don’t know.
People who are growing do.

This realisation changed everything.

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I Stopped Measuring Progress the Wrong Way

Earlier, I measured progress by:

• How many problems I solved
• How many technologies I touched
• How fast I was moving

Now, I measure progress by:

• How clearly I understand things
• How calmly I debug
• How confidently I handle unknown problems
• How often I take ownership

This shift came slowly while working in real startup environments
(which shaped my thinking →
https://dailydevnotes.in/one-year-startup-software-engineer-lessons)

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I Understood That Learning Is Not Linear

One of the biggest mindset shifts:

Growth in tech is not a straight line.

Some weeks:

• You learn a lot
• Things click
• You feel confident

Other weeks:

• Everything feels confusing
• You feel slow
• Nothing seems to stick

Earlier, bad weeks made me panic.
Now, I accept them as part of the process.

This acceptance removed a lot of pressure.

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I Stopped Chasing Everything at Once

At one point, I wanted to:

• Master DSA
• Learn backend deeply
• Improve frontend
• Learn system design
• Build side projects
• Keep up with trends

That’s not ambition — that’s overload.

I learned to focus on one main direction at a time.

When I shifted my focus to development and real projects, things finally started making sense
(which I reflected on here →
https://dailydevnotes.in/how-i-learn-new-tech-fast-as-a-software-engineer)

Focus reduced noise.
Noise was making me feel behind.

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I Realised “Behind” Is Relative

Behind compared to whom?

Someone with:

• More years of experience?
• A different background?
• More time?
• Fewer responsibilities?

Everyone starts from a different place.

Once I stopped using others as my benchmark and started using my past self, the anxiety reduced.

Progress became visible again.

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I Built Proof Instead of Consuming Motivation

Motivation fades quickly.
Proof lasts longer.

I started building proof by:

• Writing code regularly
• Using GitHub consistently
• Revisiting old projects
• Seeing improvement over time

Looking at my own GitHub history reminded me:

I am moving forward — even if it’s slow.

(This is why GitHub became important for me →
https://dailydevnotes.in/importance-of-github-for-software-engineers)

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I Learned That Confusion Is a Sign of Growth

Earlier, confusion made me think:

“Maybe I’m not good at this.”

Now, confusion tells me:

“You’re learning something new.”

This mindset shift was especially important while debugging complex issues
(which I wrote about here →
https://dailydevnotes.in/how-i-debug-when-i-dont-know-where-the-bug-is)

If you’re confused, it means your brain is stretching.

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I Stopped Waiting to Feel “Ready”

I used to think:

“I’ll feel confident once I know enough.”

That day never comes.

Confidence didn’t come from knowing everything.
It came from figuring things out repeatedly.

Once backend finally clicked for me, it wasn’t because I learned more — it was because I connected the dots
(related post →
https://dailydevnotes.in/when-backend-finally-clicked-for-me)

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What Finally Helped Me Feel Grounded

These habits made the biggest difference:

• Writing what I learn (like this blog)
• Building things even when unsure
• Taking responsibility early
• Asking better questions
• Reducing comparison

Progress became quieter — but more real.

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If You’re Feeling Behind Right Now

Let me tell you this clearly:

You are not late.
You are not slow.
You are not failing.

You’re learning something that takes time.

Most people quit at this stage — not because they can’t learn, but because they think they’re behind.

Don’t make that mistake.

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Final Thoughts

I still feel behind sometimes.

But now I understand:

• Feeling behind doesn’t mean stopping
• It means adjusting
• It means focusing
• It means trusting the process

You don’t need to catch up with everyone.

You just need to keep going.

— Irshad